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To prepare your funeral or not

More and more people are leaving instructions for THEIR funeral but is this the right thing to do?

Preparing your own funeral can really help loved ones left behind know what you want and take away the pressure of writing your life story and choosing music, poems, etc. They can find the whole process easier and take comfort knowing they are giving you the ‘send off’ you wanted. For many this helps them with their grief too.

A funeral is ABOUT the person who has passed away but it is also FOR those that are left behind. This sometimes means instructions can be conflicting for loved ones, as it is not how they want to say “goodbye.”


A service I did recently where I was working with the daughter of a man who had passed away. He had requested a non-religious service, he was a Scientist, however, the daughter and her family are practising Catholics so although she wanted to honour her Father’s wishes they conflicted with her own needs with regards to how to say “farewell.”

Another service, the lady who had passed away had no partner or children, her nearest relative was a step-daughter. Having only been a part of the ladies life for the later years, if she had not been left information about her life, choice of music and poems, the arrangements would have been a lot harder.

Another lady left poems and music choice for her husband and daughter, which gave them a great deal of comfort in the arrangements and moving forward.

A Celebrant led service can help you combine left instructions with what you want for your farewell. A Celebrant led ceremony can be conventional if that is what you want but it can also be unconventional incorporating different view points.

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